On this journey …

Today is one of those days when it is just so wonderful to be alive! The weather is perfect, the stress of the week is over, and I am enjoying a rare moment of time to myself while Madi sleeps and Jeremy runs errands. So FINALLY, I will write. 🙂

Lately, I have been on a journey of creating a stronger self inside and out. Becoming a mom was one of the most challenging curves life has ever thrown me. It seemed more than I could handle at times and the saying “when it rains, it pours,” was more than appropriate for how life was in the past year. Missing family who were far when I needed them close, losing friendships that I thought were certain, my husband losing his job and with it our sense of security, battling for and with a close friend who was dealing with alcoholism, and the list goes on … But somehow at the beginning of the year is was like I was given a revelation of sorts – You can care and care and care for everyone, which is wonderful, but sometimes the most important person to care for is your self. So from someone who NEVER makes New Years resolutions, one was made. I was going to learn to take time to take care of me.

I still have to make a conscious choice to not feel guilty and there are still days when the stress seems to be more than I can handle, but deep inside now I know I can handle it. So I have a choice, a choice to give into guilt, fear, and stress or to let go, relax, and know that no matter how hard I try to control things it will not change the outcome. I love this quote by Deepak Chopra,”Every time you are tempted to react in the same old way, ask if you want to be a prisoner of the past or a pioneer of the future.” This brings to mind a picture of Madi, sometime while walking she likes to turn and look behind her. Most of the time this doesn’t work out so well for her because she ends up bumping into walls. So it is with us, our journey forward will never be truly successful unless we stop looking back and start moving fully forward. Looking back only cause pain as we bump, moving forward creates freedom!

One thing I know for certain, “”You are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem and smarter than you think.”

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